by Nicholas Duck
The memories of Vietnam stuck with Drouin RSL president Rod McNab long after he'd left the country's shores. It just took him a while to realise how much.

A born and bred local, Rod was selected for national service during his time at teachers college. He was able to defer, meaning he headed into training at age 22.
"It was one of those funny things because I always felt that I would be," he said of his call-up. I could drive you right now to the letterbox where I posted off my registration papers. I remember it so clearly, I put the envelope in and said 'that's that.'"
Rod's father had trained as a commando in World War II and his mother had served in auxiliary services, the idea of heading into the army was a fairly natural one in the McNab household.
"I'll always remember their reaction when I landed home at Essendon airport but it never really hit me until later when I had kids of my own as to how it must have felt for two people who had experienced war, how it must have felt for their son to be there."
While physically fit, Rod initially struggled during training with the heat at Puckapunyal. He recalled sweating so much one day an officer actually asked him if he was alright.
He quickly earned the nickname 'the chalkie' due to his teaching background, making fast friends with the blokes around him.
One of them was fellow local Lynton Malley, a former guest on the My Service, My Story podcast, and a man Rod proudly calls a friend to this day.
Rod and Lynton met on day one and became thick as thieves, causing all sorts of mischief in the process. Rod remembers them sneaking out of camp at times, heading to concerts and other activities.
The pair volunteered for the infantry together and after three weeks of jungle training, Rod found himself getting on a plane overseas in the fittest state he'd ever been.
Public opinion on Australia's involvement in the Vietnam War shifted greatly during Rod's time in the infantry. He admitted he headed to Vietnam without a real idea of the situation he was walking into.
"When you look back on it you're stupidly naïve. Not really much of an idea. I certainly had no idea of the politics of the situation," he said.
"In a fairly naïve way I suppose we opposed the opposition. We were quite in favour of doing what we were doing and it's not until later years that I really read and understood what was really going on."
After arriving in Vietnam and the Australian base camp at Nui Dat, Rod and his fellow infantrymen got used to the daily rigour of life during the war. As reinforcements, they were quickly sent out with troops who had already been there for some time, allowing them to get up to speed on the grim reality they were facing.
Most of the time they were doing things like patrolling, setting up ambushes and searching villages before setting up camp somewhere in the bush before waking up to do it all again the next day.
Camping out had its share of challenges. "You're sharing your workplace with scorpions and leeches and ants and unfriendly vegetation and snakes and the odd local who didn't want to see you there," Rod said.
Rod considers himself fortunate in that he managed to avoid being ambushed by Viet Cong forces for the most part, his contact instead being limited to the occasional skirmish.
It was still an extremely stressful environment to be in, but he knows things could have been worse.
There were still moments of levity thrown in there. How could there not be, when you leave a bunch of young Aussie blokes together for long stretches of time?
One story that stands out was when he and his fellow reinforcements were left to look after camp for a time as one battalion left Vietnam and another was arriving.
Realising the chance for some mischief, Rod broke into the bar and nabbed a few cartons of alcohol.
"I wrote on the wall that McNab owes for three cartons. So there was no intention to steal or mislead anybody," he said with a smile.
Feeling guilty - and perhaps a bit sore - the next day, Rod and his mates set about replacing the cartons with what they could find around the camp, but broke a window in the process, triggering an investigation from those higher-up who returned to find the damage.
Rod found it amusing they had to be questioned at all, given he quite literally signed off on his indiscretion.
Rod's service finished with a six-month stint in Malaysia that was more ceremonial and less conflict-laden, before returning to Australia to settle into civilian life once more.
It wasn't easy. Despite telling himself nothing was wrong, Rod was dealing with the effects of PTSD, anxiety and depression.
"The difficulty, and it's the same with all of these issues, is accepting that there is a problem and recognising it and having a clear and honest understanding of where you are and then an understanding of where you're wanting to be," he said.
"I had no idea really of where I was. I thought I did, but I didn't in hindsight."
Rod's career and first marriage broke down largely due to the battles he was facing in his mind, forcing him to accept there was a problem that needed solving.
Since retiring he has taken up roles with the Drouin RSL and worked as an advocate at the West Gippsland Veterans Welfare Centre, assisting fellow veterans wanting to make claims with the Department of Veterans Affairs.
Though he found it rewarding, he wished the Australian government would do more to help the people they sent to war.
"They seem to think that you can pick people up off the street, send them out into a war environment, finish their time and turn them loose and everything will go back to normal. It just doesn't work."
Rod maintains contact with the men he served with, the friendships forged in adversity being one of the positives from his service.
"There's a bond in there that, and it sounds unkind in a way, but somebody put it a while ago that it's something that we can't explain and you can't understand. And that sounds a bit dismissive but that's sort of what it is."